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It's Tough by ~shinogami:iconshinogami:

Categories Literature > Poetry > General Poetry > Open


It’s tough when you need help
and it’s all your own fault
But the worlds a hard place,
and the worst things are sometimes balanced
by the little things in your life
Like “Scrubs” or a good novel
great poetry and the taste of warm chocolate-chip cookies
and the way the road smells after it rains
And those days that Dad is in a good enough mood
to let you put your music on while you drive him somewhere
The extra rep you hit in the gym, the good ache in your legs
after a long long run. But somehow
those things aren’t always enough to help
I hope they are this time, please God
I hope they are this time.
©2008-2009 ~shinogami
:iconshinogami:

Author's Comments

This is mostly drivel, and it sounds a lot more Emo than it really is. But I wrote it, and felt obligated to post it. If you want/need an explanation let me know, but I'm sure as hell not typing it in here right now.
Sorry for my bad mood everyone.
Thanks for any comments

Comments


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:iconcrossdouble:
!Crossdouble Jun 16, 2008, 9:37:22 AM
Advanced Critique Encouraged:

.....

--
*General-Photographer
:iconshinogami:
~shinogami Jun 16, 2008, 10:35:27 AM
I don't know what to tell you--I put that on everything to make sure I avoid comments that are equivocal to "this is awesome, I wouldn't change anything" because I know my poetry is NOT up to that level of snuff.

--
"When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him.
-Jonathan Swift "Thoughts on Various Subjects Moral and Diverting""A Confederacy of Dunces" by John Kennedy O'Toole
:iconcrossdouble:
!Crossdouble Jun 16, 2008, 12:41:25 PM
hmm, well what do you want to hear from all those wannabe's?

"Oh, it needs fucking much improvement"?

well you know, the poem itself is nicely written, but somehow a bit of the mood is lost in it...

--
*General-Photographer
:iconshinogami:
~shinogami Jun 16, 2008, 12:57:32 PM
haha well hearing that, "t needs fucking much improvement" isn't much better, but I like to think that if I offer up the fact that I realize it isn't perfect means that people will be more willing to actually say what they like/dislike et cetera
Yes, I agree that some of the mood is lost, and I don't know if that was particularly deliberate or not. But thanks, I myself didn't think it was particularly nicely written haha

--
"When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him.
-Jonathan Swift "Thoughts on Various Subjects Moral and Diverting""A Confederacy of Dunces" by John Kennedy O'Toole
:iconcrossdouble:
!Crossdouble Jun 16, 2008, 1:54:16 PM
some compliment must be, cuz if you put everything negative it isn't as nice either. :D

--
*General-Photographer
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